Social Skills, Some Basketball, & Success

Your ability to have powerful social skills is crucial, whether it's networking, finding people to believe and invest in your vision, or to have someone take you under their wing to show you the ropes. It all comes down to a few principles.

1. Don't be intimidated. Intimidation brings forth fear. Contrary to popular opinion, all fear isn't bad. You should fear having a bad life. This will inevitably motivate you to do some work if it's in the right balance. When I'm talking about intimidation, I mean the insecurities that can pop up when we first start out something. Our minds quickly wrap around the idea that everyone is assuming we know nothing when starting out. But it's not always the case. Stay cool under pressure. Weakness breathes desperation and the truth is nobody wants to be around someone desperate. If you think about it, we all are going to end up with same fate as someone else so don't let it get to you. We're all in the same path. 
2. Don't be arrogant. When you're around real powerful people, shit you think impresses them probably won't. You might have a fancy car or expensive clothes. It really means nothing. They might have houses of expensive clothes or fleets of fast and luxurious cars. Stay humble. They may not even have an interest in either. Just stick with how you can contribute to them. How? By showing them what you know. In other words, knowledge & skills. 
3. What do you know? The first thing people jump to when discussing social-skills in business is networking. Persuasion also comes to mind. But, before doing these things...if you don't know shit people will figure that out quickly. It's easy to spot. An example of this is the NBA. I love basketball and have been watching it ever since I was 4 years old...Granted the team I root for has been inept for practically a decade (New York Knicks). So one thing you quickly can spot is, who is a good player and who isn't. Who can contribute and who can't. Now we aren't professional scouts or anything, but those who can't play will quickly be out of the league within a year or two. And majority of the time it's obvious even to passive fans of the game. The same applies to every field. This shouldn't scare you. This should make you excited. Why? Regardless of how much money you have or your status, you can almost always learn and know things. Libraries are free. There's Google, YouTube, free blogs, free books, and free online courses. But it takes effort and sacrifice to open a book which is why most people make excuses. 

Above are just some of the takeaways I got from the book. But there are also practical actions you can use, such as being a good listener, remembering people's names, and smiling. All these are wonderful tips, but they have to have substance to be built upon. Definitely pick up a copy of How To Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie if you haven't already. It's changed millions of lives and it can change yours too.

 

 

My name is Romario Villanueva.  Entrepreneur & blogger. I'm a graduate from Rutgers University with several certifications from top schools through Coursera. I love all things business, psychology, and basketball. Feel free to reach out to me on Facebook and LinkedIn